Back On The (O2) Wagon

As the Preemie Mantra goes,

"Two steps forward, one step back"...I spent the weekend feeling quite discouraged. As the week progressed last week after Caleb's surgery, he just kept getting more and more congested-sounding and labored more and more to breathe. By Friday we had to put him back on oxygen, two breathing treatments and those two old diuretics...the theory is that he needed some help getting rid of all of the fluid from surgery. Felt just like old times. Ha. It is quite difficult for me to go backwards...I am excited and proud and mostly RELIEVED when we make some kind of progress, and then to have to go back is just crazy!!! Joshua reminds me that "Caleb did have surgery, Jennie" and I have to think of what it's like for a body to go through that, let alone that sweet little guy's body to go through it. I try not to say "little guy" anymore, but it still comes out sometimes. Like on the "Bee Movie" when the bees all chant, "THINKING BEE!! THINKING BEE!! THINKING BEE!!", I must be THINKING BIG, THINKING BIG, THINKING BIG!!!, as in size, growth, weight gain, eating lots and lots, growing more and more, Grow, Caleb, Grow!!! Growth seems to be the answer to all of our "issues".

I took the above photos this morning after breakfast, Caleb fast asleep with a full belly and his big brother harassing the camera woman for his turn at a photo op. No, he hasn't joined up with NASCAR, he just still has on his Lightning McQueen pj's.

Sitting here writing this, I realize how blessed I am to have spent the morning with these two ragamuffins. Last night I went to bed wondering if I was really cut out for Mom-ness. Today, we've weaned Caleb down on his oxygen and will hopefully be off of it again very soon, and I am in the starting blocks, ready to put my feet down for the next two steps forward....AND THEY'RE OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!